My 2nd Chance at Life.

There are many sign posts in our life which move us to a spiritually deeper place. The entry of each of my children and grandchildren have all done that in my life. December 9, 2013 is a day that has given my heart new eyes to see and love. The day dawned as a typical day, but within minutes of waking I was in the clutches of what could have been the last moments of my earthly life. I knew I was dying, and as I looked through my house, my main focus was to get to the bathroom and not die in front of the Christmas tree. My vision tunneled and shadowed, as if there was a shortage of light bulbs in the house. I must have been on wings of angels to arrive in the bathroom, and hear my cell phone ringing there. It was my husband, who called for an ambulance. As I was rolled out our front door on the gurney, I remember looking at the ceiling and thinking this is the last time I will go through this door. The 20 miles to the hospital in the ambulance was filled with multiple attempts to start an IV, but I was in a conversation with God. “Please let me live, forgive me for not wanting to join you yet” over and over again. All I could think of was my family. I just didn’t want to leave them yet. The rest of the time and the arrival at the ER is a dreamlike recollection of more IV attempts, faces of my family, doctors, nurses and then the large hands of an EMT attempting to start an IV in the jugular vein in my neck. As I turned my head to the side, I don’t even remember the puncture and IV, but my mind went to a beautiful beach scene, warm, water gently lapping at the sand. I remembered words from CS Lewis about death being like leaving one shore and heading toward another. I wondered with no fear if this was my shore of departure. Fading in and out, I was told I had pulmonary embolisms in both lungs, my heart was enlarged trying to do its job, and I had clots in both legs. My husband was told there was a good chance I would not make it. Eventually I was taken up to ICU with an IV bag of liquid clot buster (don’t know the professional name of it) going into my veins. All of this time, I felt dreamlike, floating in a warm cocoon of what I now know was the peace of God that surpasses all understanding. To make a long story short, I am alive! I have been given a second chance for life, for joy, for love, for everything! There is not a day that goes by but I think about this could be my last day, or the last day of a friend or loved one. When the day comes that I am just a memory, I want my life to have been a fragrance of love and friendship to those whose path has crossed mine. And as I keep on this journey, I ask that God continue to do His work through me in loving others, and to do so with a grateful heart. So, just as you , moment by moment, day by day we continue on this path of life. There are still mountains and valleys, but we are never alone as we make our way to our day of departure.

Seasons of Life.

As the trees and foliage begin to display their glorious autumn colors, I am reminded that our lives are measured in seasons as well. We are energetic and full of optimism during the spring and summer of our lives. Childhood, teen years, to years of young parents raising children are busy, bustling years of happiness and endless activity. But then just as summer flies by and tips of trees start to glow in color, we find ourselves in the autumn of our lives. I am convinced that a time warp of some kind happens to us. There are days when I long for the fun of being at the center of a growing family again, cooking for eight at every meal. And I wish I had treasured that time more as it was happening instead of getting caught up in the busyness of life. But there is much to be thankful for in this season of life now too. Grandchildren dancing through the door bringing smiles and joy to the day, as well as being the partakers of a cookie or two. Another blessing is that of having adult children who have their own lives but still want to be a part of ours. Time is plentiful now, and it is a positive time for reflection, friends and new opportunities. A time to learn more about others, myself, and my God. A time to be able to hear the whispers from God as we learn and have time to be still. We all hope to go through all four seasons of life, as we look ahead to the impending winter. But should a season be cut short , I would want my legacy for my family to be that of love, to continue to love one another, and love the Lord with all their heart, soul and mind. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.” Prov 3:5.6

In My Heart.